"We have no occasion in this case to determine whether same-sex couples who were lawfully married in another jurisdiction prior to the adoption of Proposition 8, but whose marriages were not formally recognized in California prior to that date, are entitled to have their marriages recognized in California at this time. None of the petitioners before us in these cases falls within this category, "
Ca Supreme Court 5/26/09
It was May 27 2001 - Eight Years Ago today that Em & I had our "First Marriage" - what I consider to be our "real marriage". Over a hundred guests including her parents, brothers, uncle, grandmother, cousins & their kids & partners; My mom & dad (who are never in the same place!), sisters, friends, cousins, motorcycle club buddies, and even some of our co-workers came together on a beautiful beach and park just North of SF. It was the most wonderful day - amazing weather, a touching ceremony, amazing food, music, friends, family. But of course legally it meant NOTHING.
So we got married again when we moved to MA. this is our "legal wedding" & the sweet part is that em's brother got made an officiant for the day & he "performed" the wedding - this time there were no guests but Monito (he was 4 months old) and Dan's daughter & wife - but this got our little family health coverage (albeit taxable health coverage for me under federal law) and legally recognized in the state we are living in for now. Em still had to adopt our son for him to be "related" to her. And dont even get me started on how we file our taxes.
So last year around this time it became legal for families like ours to get married in California when the Supreme Court there held that family code 308.5 was not compatible with the State Constitution. There was a rush of couples running to the alter between 6/15 and November when prop 8 was going to be on the ballot. Over 18,000 couples - but we weren't one of them - why because we were already married right. As soon as CA recognized same sex marriages as valid my legal MA marriage should make me married in CA too. I mean no one else has to travel the country and get married in every state they may possibly want to spend some time in so we shouldn't have to either - or so I thought.
In fact we were in CA in Oct. for Mel & Veejays lovely wedding in Mendocino & I suppose we could have tried to do some quickie wedding then - but like I said we should have been married by virtue of the fact that we were married - right???
So yesterday the CA Supreme Court published its decision on the legality of Prop 8 - which took the same language that was in the Family Code Section 308.5 - marriage is between one man & one woman... and put it into the State's Constitution. They held that the Prop is valid, that it ammended rather than revised the constitution & the voters of CA can do that by a simple majority vote on a proposition thats placed on the ballot if you get signatures equal to 8% of the number of people who voted in the last Gubernatorial election (???). - But they held that the 18,000 or so folks who did get hitched in CA between June 15 & November ARE STILL LEGALLY MARRIED.
But then there is footnote 48 - and that's us - the lawfully married out of state queers who didn't think we were required to run out to CA and basically perform a sham marriage just to get a legal recognition which automatically attaches to ANY OTHER LEGALLY MARRIED COUPLE --- and now we are basically being invited to sue CA to find out if we are or are not married there.
So on that note I will say Happy Anniversary Emily - on this the date of our true wedding before our families, our community & our god - We have made it to 8 years, through two states, med school and most of residency, we have become homeowners, landlords, parents (to rats, dog & boy) - we have done good & sometimes not so good - but you have remained my partner & co-conspirator & the first memory number on my phone --- I love you.
The adventures of a butch dyke in my 40's as I get knocked up, give birth, move cross country and back and discover that FTM also stands for Full Time Mom
Wednesday, May 27
Monday, May 25
Ver-Monsters - 2009
As usual a holiday weekend with the Blue-bramsons involves Ribs, lots of Ribs. Here our lil Firefighter digs into the first batch off the grill. I had already filled him up with 4 kinds of salads, corn & chicken at this point too. The food - oh the food so yummy. We also got to enjoy the special burgers at the Burlington Farmers Market & the Homemade Rootbeer Floats. What a way to welcome the start of summer!!
Monito & his new best bud Sammy share a love of the big yellow diggers. On the way out of shelburne farms we made a pit stop to climb on, dig around and pose with a bunch of idle farm machinery. Awesome
Ila, Vi & Sammy riding on the tractor up to Shelburne Farms
Em & Monito at Shelburne
Friday, May 22
Magnolia
This awesome tortoise statue stands at the opening of the park in the Magnolia neighborhood in Seattle. My aunt Suzan brought Monito & I here to play & pointed out that my dads first house in Seattle was just up the hill before his family moved to Queen Anne (where she lives now) & later into the outlying areas. I forget some times when we are in Seattle that our family is actually from there.
Thursday, May 21
Sunday, May 17
Sunday, May 10
Tuesday, May 5
Monday, May 4
Bouncy House
We went to May Fair in Harvard Square yesterday & the lil monkey had his First Experience in a bouncy house. When his 2 minutes were up & it was time for him & the other 2 little girls to come out he ran into the middle of the house & just kept jumping. It turns out they don't have a hook or anything for you to grab your wayward child & pull them out if they get like this. As Em laughingly said "oh they must all do this" the guy manning the 2-minute line was like "No they don't".
Saturday, May 2
Viva Azteca
Here is the first of two slideshows. These are photos from what lil Monito calls "The Other Mexico". As in "Mommy, Momma I wanna go back to my other Mexico" - screamed at ohh 2:30 or 3 in the morning in a hut in Tulum ...
This is the Mexico of Pools and Calm Beaches where he spent hours with Grandpa & Mommy making sand castles then crushing them into oblivian. This is the Mexico of the Buffet and Never Ending FRUIT LOOPS where he could sit with Grandma & GG Anne noshing for hours & where Momma could always be found with a steamy cafe con leche. This is the Mexico of Farah & Matthew & Olivia all playing together in the pool like crazy monkey cousins.
This is also the Mexico of the 3pm Dance A-Long to "Hey Baby - Be My Girl", the "Beer Olympics" (Uncle Jim placed), the nightly off-off-off really really off-Broadway show (We loved Lion King) and sadly it was also the Mexico of Corey and his Canadian Buddies getting so drunk they puked all over his Man-Kini.
As you can see it has a lovely beach, an inviting pool and a sunrise thats worth being up at 6am for - and if you know my sleep habits you know that is no small praise.
Enjoy ....
This is the Mexico of Pools and Calm Beaches where he spent hours with Grandpa & Mommy making sand castles then crushing them into oblivian. This is the Mexico of the Buffet and Never Ending FRUIT LOOPS where he could sit with Grandma & GG Anne noshing for hours & where Momma could always be found with a steamy cafe con leche. This is the Mexico of Farah & Matthew & Olivia all playing together in the pool like crazy monkey cousins.
This is also the Mexico of the 3pm Dance A-Long to "Hey Baby - Be My Girl", the "Beer Olympics" (Uncle Jim placed), the nightly off-off-off really really off-Broadway show (We loved Lion King) and sadly it was also the Mexico of Corey and his Canadian Buddies getting so drunk they puked all over his Man-Kini.
As you can see it has a lovely beach, an inviting pool and a sunrise thats worth being up at 6am for - and if you know my sleep habits you know that is no small praise.
Enjoy ....
Tulum
After 5 Nights at the "Other Mexico" - the Mexico of FruitLoops and family and Spring Breakers we came down the coast a little further to the Tulum area - a very different experience. Here we stayed at Cabanas La Luna (see clip) which had about 5 rooms of varying sizes (ours was the smallest) right on the beach. They have saltwater showers & lowflow toilets an Ice Box & mosquito nets. The deck had a couple of chairs a table & our hammock - Oh yes we love us a hammock!!!! There was no food included at La Luna so until I made em run to the nearest store (over an hour by Bicycle - thanks honey!!) We randomly walked up & down the beach to try different restaurant/bars for meals & coffee. We found some EXCELLENT seafood, but I also discovered that the earliest opening is 7:30 am which doesn't work for my coffee needs when the sunrise is waking me up at 6:20.
At La Luna Monito made a lil' friend - Leo an almost 3 year old boy who also loves a good sand castle stomping & a handful of toy race cars!!! I was very thankful to have a playmate to help break up the day. I was also very thankful that Em insisted on getting me a beachside massage while we were here- Awesome!!
At La Luna Monito made a lil' friend - Leo an almost 3 year old boy who also loves a good sand castle stomping & a handful of toy race cars!!! I was very thankful to have a playmate to help break up the day. I was also very thankful that Em insisted on getting me a beachside massage while we were here- Awesome!!
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